Easy Way to Potty Train: Growing with Basia.

Basia’s (Baa-Sha) first toilet poop! Toilet training before a Human can speak. A lot of people are skeptics and don’t think it can be done, but I’ve seen it, I believe in it, and I’m not afraid to putting in the time to try.

I know it’s a lonely road and already I’ve faced a lot of negative attitudes from people, to the point that I don’t even tell people that I plan to potty train Basia at an early age. In most countries, children are potty trained before the age of two, in fact usually closer to the age of one. . In North America because we rely on these magically high absorbency diapers children reach the ages of sometimes 5 years before they are toilet trained.

When I lived in Vancouver 13 years ago I met this amazing couple (both university professors) and with my very own eyes I witnessed their 3month old baby urinate on cue over a little port a potty. I was sold. From that day on I could not imagine any other way!

How To Start

This is a learning experience for me as well but it seems pretty intuitive to me. For those that understand the principles of Pavlov’s Dog then really this should be pretty straight forward!

Essentially what I’m doing is applying the same ideas of simple behavioral conditioning. I mean how many of us have experienced the increased urge to pee even just thinking of a toilet or seeing a toilet when our bladders are full? Even myself, after holding my bladder for hours sometimes, only to pee myself just as I see the toilet, it’s because my brain has been conditioned to associate peeing with the visual cue of the toilet.

With Basia, I’ve started to take her to the bathroom before I change her diaper, sometimes after breastfeeding and sometimes when I have to go myself. In the beginning it’s difficult to do this every time but I just do my best and provide her with as many “potty opportunities,” as I can. Encouraging my spouse Adam to do the same. We usually try for 2-3 minutes and if nothing comes out then we package her back up and try again later! However more often than not Basia will make go pee/poo.

Listen and Watch

Another thing is to spend some time watching your little one. It won’t take long when you’ll be able to tell when they need to go pee/poo. Maybe it’s a face they make or how they wiggle. When you start to notice these physical cues start taking them to the toilet and giving them a minute or two to try and go.

Audio Cues

I spoke of visual cues when dealing with behavioral conditioning, but since Basia is just a two week old infant, her visual range hasn’t quite developed yet so I rely on developing her auditory cues.

Whenever we go to the bathroom I start by making “hmmm” sounds for pooping and “pshshshsh” for peeing and I insert a little “go pee/poo,” intermittently. (That’s the sound cue we use to toilet train our cat, Dragon) Follow @HowToTrainMyDragon on instagram to see my cat use the potty!

When Basia starts to go pee I emphasize the “pshshshsh” louder and more clearly and commend her with a “good girl!” And the same with if she poops but with “hmmmm.

How To Hold Them

I’ve tried various ways of supporting Basia while she potty’s and since she’s still really little and needs head support I make sure her head is leaned against my chest and she’s slightly tilted back. I find encircling my fingers around her thighs and using my plans and thumbs to support her back work the best.

Depending on what I’m doing I’ll either squat on the bathroom floor, sit on the toilet with her between my legs facing the back or sometimes facing the front. I find sitting on the toilet with her is the easiest and best ergonomically.

When To Start?

Honestly whenever you feel you’re ready to commit to trying. Some people start at 1year some at birth. Go at your own pace but be consistent. If you only want to do it once a day then make sure you did it once a day. If you want to take your little one to the toilet between every feeding, diaper change and fart then make sure you don’t skip a whole bunch of days and go hard at it again. I make it a goal to take her 3x a day and I find that’s reasonable for us.

Whatever you decide, it starts with taking that first step and just trying… let me know how it goes! And follow us on Instagram @Melba_seto for current updates and Facebook http://www.MelbasToast.com!

Imagine the possibilities of being diaper free?! And being able to communicate and read your child. Being able to be sensitive enough to your child’s needs in something as basic as peeing and pooping… leads to being able to better read them when they are sad, happy, angry, and frustrated and thus being better equipped to address their emotions. I mean if I can toilet train a cat then I’m sure I can toilet train a baby or at least give it a good go.

The Bob Ross Project

I recently began a journey that will hopefully result in growing an aspect of myself and community we never imagined possible.

What Did You Do? Continue reading

Just Try Harder. 

Several years ago my friend Roger Fage spoke three words to me that changed a huge part of my life. 

“Just Try Harder.” 

I had met Roger in Halifax around 2010 and  then during a random climbing trip to Kamourska, Quebec our paths crossed again.

We spoke of all the things and none of the things, but the one thing that stuck with me was this particularly conversation. 

He told me for a long time he was stuck. He was unable to progress in his climbing and seemed to feel like he had plateaued. Then one day, one of his friends told him the secret to success. “Just try harder.” And from then on he was surpassing his current climbing ability. 

I don’t know what it was about this moment because I’ve heard those words so many times before. However, perhaps was just the right time, the right place and the look on his face as he turned away from me and stared at the climb above us. 

Just. Try. Harder.

Ever since then it has been one of my top 5 mantras in achieving things. Whenever I feel stuck in something and feel as though I have plateaued in my own ability and skill, I take a moment to reassess what I am doing wrong. 

I look at the factors and the variables and I start making excuses. 

Then. I catch myself and it dawns of me. The words of an amazing, even keeled human…

Just try harder.

Then I take a deep breath and do you know what I do next ? I try harder. 

Since my recent ACL tear, I have felt like I have fallen backwards in so many aspects of my life. My strength, my flexibility, my will power. 

Prior to my injury I was just barely maintaining my fitness and then suddenly, goals that were already barely within arms reach had become insurmountable. I look at my before photos and now I’ve gained weight, gotten soft, lost endurance. 

I stopped writing blog posts. I stopped stretching. I stopped trying. 

I stopped trying. 

This is the moment I assess all the factors and variables again. Cloud my mind with why I can’t and why I won’t. Fill my heart with excuses.  This is also the moment that I stop doing that and get my soul together and once again realize the answer to all my recent setbacks is to,

Just Try Harder. 

Coming soon. The new and improved Melba Fucking Seto. 

YOU Have To Be the Source Of Your Inspiration. 

I just ran 7km off the couch and didn’t die. 

Often times we look to others to inspire us, push us, challenge us. Though it’s important to use others as a nitro boost, the most important place to look is in yourselves. 

I’ve been raised to compare myself to those around me. People who are smarter, taller, stronger. Where did it get me? Well for a long time it cultivated a creature who was low self confident, insecure and unsure. 

Somewhere along the way the real me emerged and I started comparing, myself  to myself and things began to change.

When I do things now, I work to outdo myself and in doing so I am solely accountable for my successes and failures. 

When we compare ourselves to someone else we can then easily make excuses for why we didn’t succced. “Oh well he can run farther because he’s a guy.” Or “they’ve trained their whole life to play sports.” 

Today I ran – like an old lady turtle – 7km.  My only goal was to get outside. Get to the next tree, the next bench, the next Canadian goose.

” Can’t Rush This. “

Shuffle step shuffle step. On more than one occasion starting from leaving work I was making excuses “ugh it’s getting late.” “I’m hungry.” 

When I parked the car at Edworthy Park I looked around and thought one thing at a time. 

I put on my heart rate monitor. I strapped my knee stabilizers. I filled my little hip water bottles.

I started to walk towards the trail. Set my playlist. Turned on my heart rate monitor. Took a breath. Here we go. 

The first 100m. Ugh I’m so awkward, my breathing is off. My legs hurt.  Then I would take a moment and look around. A train passed. I watched it and smiled. “I love trains.”

Shuffle step shuffle step. One step at a time. 

It’s a lot like life. When you look at the whole picture, we get overwhelmed. Work, bills, life, success. If we just try to look at one thing at a time, just the things in front of us. Time will pass, things will get done and before you know it your knees no longer hurt. Your breathing is steady, the world is less scary and 7km seems like something totally doable.

I only had myself to compete with and whether I finished or not I’m just happy I make the effort to show up. However since I DID finish!! I now have something to look to when I need to inspire myself. 

Now. I eat.