Many of my followers know I am constantly trying new things in order to continue personal growth, and also so that I can hopefully inspire those around me that it’s never too late. It will be hard and unnerving as an adult but it’s never too late.
People think I am brave for trying new things but it’s actually the opposite quality that motivates me. It’s fear that drives me to not stay stagnant.
One shameful memory that I often look back on as a strong lesson learned is when I was 20 or 21 years old. I really wanted to take dance lessons, so I signed up for a hip hop class in Vancouver. I registered and paid for it, but when the first day came closer, I became afraid, intimidated and started to doubt myself.
I started to worry about how many people would be in the class and what if I sucked and how far the bike ride was to get there. In the end. I didn’t go. Not even one class.
It was one of the most upsetting choices in my life I have ever made.
Since then I use that incident as a reminder to pony up and never do that again. The fear of failing myself and failing those around me as someone who does what she says she will do but doesn’t do it ? Ugh. Terrible.
This is always why periodically I try new things out of my comfort zone so I don’t ever get into that “it’s been too long , I can’t,” mindset.
With that in mind, I have recently started a new night course, Comic and Graphic Novel Writing. It’s something I’ve been wanting to do for several years now, but it’s not something that gets offered very often.
Now that I am getting close to pushing out a baby from my belly, I searched online again for a graphic novel course and lo and behold I found one that’s one day a week, for 6 weeks. Just in time for baby!
Once again as the start day drew close, I nervous and anxious. I was confused by the new online technology for accessing resources and materials. I had no clue what half the art supplies were on the “required list,” and that was a stressful ordeal trying to find things. Don’t even get me started on the run around I got from trying to create a Log – In. I’m so outdated.
I felt like a complete dud. Everyone in the class was going to be some sort of artist and pursuing a possible profession in graphic novel writing, whereas here I was, pregnant, out of my league and potentially terrible at drawing.
I mean I dabble in drawing but it’s not something I have spent enough time and experience in to be very good at. Once again I was starting to feel moments of inadequacies.
Then I remembered those missed hip hop classes. I packed up what “required supplies,” I could figure out, my snack bag and waddled my way into Room 1150 at Mount Royal University. Of course being a keener, I was first to arrive.
Here it goes. Melba is going to learn how to create graphic novel. Today’s lesson? The most important thing about life is REALLY all about showing up. Everything else will fall into place.